damian5145
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Another script for review, thanks for listening.
Truth is most motorcycle insurance costs about the same. What’s not the same, is the coverage. Now you can get the AllState protection you need.. for a price you can afford. Talk to an All State agent today. Are you in good hands?Awesome! I think both scripts are really well done. Your voice is friendly and conversational. You sound like a great fit for corporate narration and E-learning.
Another script for performance feedback, let me have it!
By mid-1940, the German Army had conquered all of western Europe. H****r was tightening the noose around Britain. In the Atlantic, German U-boats were decimating Allied convoys, threatening to cut off Britain’s only lifeline. But Churchill had a secret weapon, the strangest military establishment in the world. Crossword fanatics, chess champions, mathematicians, students and professors, Americans and British, all came here with one common aim: to unlock the secrets of the Enigma, a machine that concealed Germany’s war plans in seemingly unbreakable code. If Enigma could be penetrated, everything H****r plotted would be known in advance. At Bletchley Park, there unfolded one of the most astonishing exploits of the Second World War.For the first one try smiling for a more friendly “Hello” since it is a commercial. For both reads there are some plosives and mouth noise from possibly being too close to the mic. Otherwise both reads are very conversational and good job varying the tone and attitude between both scripts.
The second one is fantastic, well done! The first one is a little too forced. I agree with the other commentator that the pauses are distracting and the drama is coming off as fake. Keep at it!
Looking for performance feedback, thanks!
Script: “This lesson dedicated to snare drum rudiments introduces the Flams: Flam Accent, Flam Paradiddle, Flamacue and Flam Tap.
The Flam, in musical theory and writing, doesn’t have a definite value; it can be described as a double stroke made by a first-hand weak stroke closely followed by an accented, stronger second-hand stroke. It’s a grace note, represented in drum charts by a smaller note with a tie put just before the principal note. For a correct execution of a Flam, the stick that plays the weaker stroke starts from about one inch from the drumhead, and the stick that plays the principal stroke starts from a superior height.”
