Reply To: Feedback Forum

Homepage Forums The Feedback Forum! Feedback Forum Reply To: Feedback Forum

#80466
jliebert
Participant

Hi All –
I’d greatly appreciate some feedback on the attached recordings. I didn’t use a pro mic, so just technique comments please. Specifically, I worked on pacing, and “flow” (painting a picture, finding “beats” in the script, ensuring it has a beginning/middle/end). Feedback on those aspects are particularly welcome, although any feedback is great!

Here is the copy I used:

Real Estate Educational Explainer:
Would you like to buy a house?
Maybe it’s your first house, or even your 2nd and you just think that MAYBE you didn’t think hard enough about the last one.
Listen, I love Real Estate. And in most cases, even a bad deal can work to your advantage in the very long run.
But there are dumb things that people do without realizing it when they buy a house.
Humor me for a short story before we get into the meat of this video.

Cosmos Documentary:
Welcome to the planet earth. A place of blue nitrogen skies, oceans of liquid water, cool forests, soft meadows; A world positively rippling with life. From the cosmic perspective, it is, for the moment, unique. The only world on which we know with certainty that the matter of the cosmos has become alive, and aware. There must be many such worlds scattered through space, but our search for them begins here, with the accumulated wisdom of the men and women of our species, acquired at great cost, over a million years.

Biogenetic Law:
Commonly summarized as “ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny” (on-TA-jeh-nee re-cah-PIT-you-lates fill-AH-jeh-nee), biogenetic law posits that the embryonic stages in the development of an individual (its ontogeny) repeat the evolutionary history of its ancestors (its phylogeny). A corollary of the biogenetic law is the idea that new evolutionary features are typically added at the end of development, with formerly adult, or “terminal” stages gradually being compressed into progressively earlier stages (or sometimes being eliminated outright).

Thanks so much!
Jeff

Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.