Reply To: Feedback Forum
First of all, you need to invest in a better recording setup. I could barely hear you, but I could make out enough. You had a great tone and tempo in the Radio Promo and I think you hit good words. However, when you were performing the radio station, the time, and the event, you sounded as if you lost your place and picked it up mid-sentence. This in turn lead you to sound lost in what you were trying to express and even sounded like you were trying to remember the event. If you slip up during recording, you must go back to the last comma or period and start over. That makes the script flow better.
The Baby Shampoo on the other hand sounded like you were going all over the place with your overall tone and there were too many pauses. The words you hit were good, but the tone sounded more like a whiny kid begging someone to try their product. I think you ought to find some baby shampoo commercials on YouTube to better understand how they sound and get inspiration. I hope this helps.