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Hi Jay!
Good job on this. I like how you are connected the words together on this – it flows well for the most part. When you say “make your flight” at the beginning the pace is off and it does feel a bit choppy. It also feels just a bit too melodic as you continue through the read as if you are running up and down and up and down in a similar rhythm and tone through each of the sentences. I would recommend just putting a bit of variety throughout the read!
Have fun!