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My biggest critique is with your mic set up location. I was distracted by your background noise a lot during your read. My advice would be to find a isolated room in your place, put up some moving blankets as a start to create a better controlled sound space eliminating as much reverberation as possible. A really great mic can pick up any distracting sound in the background if the room you are recording in is not sound treated well. Think of your practice as a dress rehearsal for your client.