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I think this is a good documentary-style delivery. It would sound more natural and authentic though with the breaths, or at least the space for breaths, left in. By taking them all out and not replacing them with room tone, you’ve made this sound rather robotic, like it’s a synthesized voice. Why not just bring the volume of the breaths down with your editing software, if you are concerned about them distracting the listener. Thanks for sharing. Bill A.
