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Would love some feedback on this audiobook I auditioned for. I’ve had success in just about every facet of VO work but just can’t seem to crack the nut that is audiobooks.

Dennis begins to look through the hotel register and noticed an inordinately large number of comps. He began writing down the names and addresses of every guest that received any comp. It wasn’t even 8 in the morning yet and the office was empty. The phone rang and it startled him.
“Could I speak to Dennis Gomes?”
“Hey, Dennis this is Officer Jacobs from the Chicago Organized Crime unit. We met at the L.E.I.U. convention.”
“Right. How are you? What can I do for you?”
“I’m good thanks. I was hoping to check with you regarding our good friend, Tony Spilotro tosee what he’s been up to.”
“Spilotro has a gift shop he runs at the Circus Circus under a different name, but other than that, he’s been keeping a pretty low profile.”
“If you see or hear anything about him, could you let me know?” “Sure. No problem. Is something going on?”
“We’re just working on a m****r case involving him here in Chicago.” Dennis said, “I’ll check in on him for you and will get back to you.”
“Thanks, man. And, hey, keep in mind, Spilotro is not the type to keep a low profile. He’s demented, a real loose canon.”
Dennis hung up the phone. The day hadn’t even officially started, but he was back in the action.
Within an hour Dennis had Dick, Rich, and Duane neck-deep in the Aladdin’s hotel log. Before the magnifying glasses were even out, the red flags began turning up. The three Detroit applicants who had been denied licenses because of their mob ties, had been fully comped at the Alladin, on numerous occasions, for stays lasting up to three weeks. In addition, James Tamer and Phil Peters, both known mobsters, had been comped. In addition, t the soldiers and lieutenants of James “Jimmy” Michaels and John Vitale’s orgainized crime families had also been catered to and fully comped. These were not just little fish or associates of someone, they were made members of the Michaels and Vitale organized crime families.
The rush was coming back for Dennis. He was gathering photos and information on the Detroit and St. Louis mafia so that when he engaged in his planned undercover surveillance, he would know who to look for. He zoned in on James Michaels, Sr., “Horseshoe Jimmy” as he was once known as, who cut his teeth with the Cuckoos Gang. His criminal career began at an early age Hearrested at just 19 years old for the robbery of the Illinois Central Freight Depot. He subsequently jumped bond but was captured a year later and sentenced to ten years to life. He was briefly released, but arrested again for a series of gangland killings; for which he was never convicted. He served 13 years for the robbery, was released and quickly found his way back to his criminal ways. He worked his way up to Capo of the Syrian faction of the St. Louis mob and wielded a great deal of control over the St. Louis labor unions. Dennis found a picture of old Horseshoe, now close to 70. He had a full head of white hair, coal black beady eyes and a chewed up cigar holding up his lips. His face was twisted into a scowl which Dennis thought made
him look like one mean son of a b***h. Even though he was in his late 60’s Dennis could tell he was tough.

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