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#62328
dkosoydkosoy
Participant

Hi Mary. I like the first one better. In the second one, the inflection on “one topping” seems off, and the “Dominooooos” does something funny at the end. 🙂 On both of them, I don’t think “Then” should be emphasized. Pick one of the higher impact words instead? Overall, I find high energy and wide tonal variation challenging, so I’m not one to comment, however I think that’s what this Domino’s script is looking for. I think you could be even more upbeat, increase the tempo some and pause less at the commas, and really convey the idea of someone dying to dig into one of these pizzas! I hope this helps.