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Hey Rogue1, I liked both reads! I could totally picture a guy watching as if hypnotized for the first read, really made me chuckle thinking about it. The second read was good as well, and I think draws you in more quickly and then brings you to the same ending point of the other script where you see a man hypnotized, like at first maybe he runs into the room then is stopped dead in his tracks by the awesome TV, whereas in the first one he is hypnotized the whole time.
I too think that you could really emphasize “82” SAMSUNG QLED TV” both times, to make it even more like a “Wow this is happening!” sort of moment, which might make it even more humorous. Really good!
Mary
