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I think that both reads are good for this advertisement. Good recording quality as well. I think you can try and merge the two reads together. Find a balance between the two performances that will really make us, as listeners, want to go on a vacation by the beach and a vacation.
As a matter of picking between the first and second performance, I thought the second read was more heartfelt and luring the audience into the commercial and making us want to be there. Hope this critique is helpful
