[Kent]

Wow. That is some of the best reading I’ve heard on here.
I think the speed of the first is bordering on too slow, but with the subject matter’s seriousness, you certainly don’t want to rush. As to delineation of the items, you could vary some more. They almost sound like separate sentences if they’re not individualized (pitch-wise) enough.
With the second, it sure sounds good and informative. Friendly and personal descriptions of the eye are what everyone is clamoring for, of course. But, if it’s less stodgy and more relatable(?) that are the goals, I’d say maybe speed it up a bit and use some higher tones. When you’re dictating facts, it’s tough to think, and therefore sound that way – at least it is for me.
I find Audacity to be a great tool and it’s simple. Maybe check YouTube for a 5 Step video by Serge M. It’s old and bare bones, but a good framework to build from. At least it helped me.
Keep up the good work!